In a nocturnal, post-apocalyptical world, a rebellious teenage girl goes against the suppressive, censoring government and escapes the normal nightime life while everyone is asleep.
I was intrigued by the word "nocturnal"... is this going to be a world in endless night? (Of course, with the word limit, it'd be hard to expand any more on that.) For the final draft, I'd like to nitpick and suggest a few minor spelling corrections: *post-apocalyptic, *nighttime; and I'm not sure "suppressive" is a real word (though I certainly understand what it should mean). But the overall line is promising.
I enjoy the whole escape the "normail nighttime" life, it leaves me questioning about where she goes and what it's like. I agree with Peter and Zach with the grammatical error, which are an easy fix!
sounds like a great concept! i can picture it having a lot of action, just make sure you balance action, love, whatever other element you want to include to keep your audience interested!
Sounds interesting, but shouldn't it be post-apocaliptic world? Other than that, it seem like it will be a good script.
ReplyDeleteI was intrigued by the word "nocturnal"... is this going to be a world in endless night? (Of course, with the word limit, it'd be hard to expand any more on that.) For the final draft, I'd like to nitpick and suggest a few minor spelling corrections: *post-apocalyptic, *nighttime; and I'm not sure "suppressive" is a real word (though I certainly understand what it should mean). But the overall line is promising.
ReplyDeleteI enjoy the whole escape the "normail nighttime" life, it leaves me questioning about where she goes and what it's like. I agree with Peter and Zach with the grammatical error, which are an easy fix!
ReplyDeleteOverall good job!
sounds like a great concept! i can picture it having a lot of action, just make sure you balance action, love, whatever other element you want to include to keep your audience interested!
ReplyDelete